Forget And Not Slow Down....

There is a song by the wonderful band Relient K called Forget And Not Slow Down, and the lyrics are as follows:

How many times
Can I push it aside
Is it time I befriended all the ghosts of all the things that haunt me most
So they leave me alone
Move on with my life
Be certain the steps of left and right don't fight the direction of upright

I'd rather forget and not slow down
Than gather regret for the things I can't change now
If I become what I can't accept
Resurrect the saint from within the wretch
Pour over me and wash my hands of it

It's time to decide
Which is out of my mind
Cause it'll be me unless I put some thoughts to rest and leave some faults behind
I'll watch the glint in my eye
Shine off the spring in my step
And could be blinding depending on the amount of You that I reflect

Cause I could spend my life just trying to sift through
What I could've done better but what good do what ifs do
Oh oh
Oh oh
There's something I should tell you now

This song is one that I've heard many times, but not until today did the lyrics really occur to me. Even the title speaks volumes. We hear the saying "Forgive and forget" all the time, but if you really think about forgiving people, and the process of doing that, it sets us back relationally. The title "Forget and not slow down" is projected in the song in the phrase "I'd rather forget and not slow down." In all actuality, wouldn't it just be easier to forget, not worry about forgiving, and never have that issue with setback in relationships?

I've learned from experience that, while this may be easier, it wouldn't solve any problems. To forget about a problem and not confront it, especially when it comes to relationships, will lead to nothing but greater pain. I had a friend that drove me crazy, but due to my fear on confrontation, whenever this friend would do something i disagreed with, such as putting down different races or using women, I wouldn't say anything. One day, we decided to move in together. So we got an apartment, and his jokes and issues continued, and i continued to not say anything. Eventually, it started to get on my nerves, and it began to get to the point where every little thing he did infuriated me. Eventually, we got in a huge fight and things haven't been the same between us since then.

If I had spoken my mind, let him know that his jokes bothered me, maybe things would have been better. Maybe he would have tried to censor himself around me a little more, and I would have been okay with that.

The only thing about stuff like that is that I hate when people aren't completely real around me. It drives me insane.

Thats not the point though.

Looking back at the song, my favorite line in this song is "Cause I could spend my life just trying to sift through,

What I could've done better but what good do what ifs do?"

This line speaks to me because I do this all the time. I look back at my life and think about times when I could have done better (See the above example), and I think about the "what ifs" of life. What if I'd persued her? What if I'd told them? What if I really put myself out there?

Then I realize something. What good will "what ifs" do? If I want to put myself out, I can do it. Life isn't what you've missed. Life is what you make it. And, for some of us, life is what you and God make it.

So don't spend your life worrying about setbacks that come with forgiveness. Forgiveness is important, and can change things drastically. And don't look back and life and wonder what you could or should have done. Focus on what you are doing and where you are headed.

Life is a journey, and with God, you have something to aim for.

Love you guys, and keep your eyes out for more soon!

Aaron Jay